“Pivot! Pivot! Pivot!”
May 5, 2020
This is week 2 of distance learning for my kids. Last week was rough, to say the least. Information was everywhere on Canvas (learning management system) and in email, coming from multiple sources. Many messages contained errors which had to be corrected – so there were multiple emails, which created confusion.
On Day 1, which was April 27th, my children became victims of my emotional unpreparedness. Weeks ago, I had set them up on a schedule which allowed them to move through the day independently, doing some “academic” work, practice music, read, and enjoy free time. So, naturally, because I’m apparently new to life, I thought Day 1 of distance learning would go similarly.
I sat the kids down at their individual desks and said, “okay, have fun!” and I sat down at my own desk to work. Within 1 minute, they were lost – Where do I go? Where do I find this? What does this mean? I can’t find it. I don’t understand.
Well, duh. Why did I think that a 1st grader and a 5th grader could get on Canvas and navigate the various message, modules, announcements, videos, and assignments on their own? To start with, while my 1st grader is a good reader, he is still learning to read and cannot yet read to learn (or to follow multiple step written directions).
Me: Okay, buddy. Read this page.
He reads it.
Me: So, what do you need to do?
Kid: I don’t know.
Me: But you just read the directions.
He just stares back at me, blinking his eyes.
But of course. I was myself confused about everything and so as I tried to help them figure out what to do and how to do it, my frustration and anger rose. I yelled and snapped at the kids. I might have said some bad words under my breath (or a bit louder).
The sudden change of plan for the day – I had my own class to meet on Zoom and I needed to prepare for – is what drove me crazy. For some reason, I could not “pivot” (starting to really resent this word) my attitude or expectation. I couldn’t stop thinking about the work that waited for me at my own desk. Though this was not urgent work, the fact that I couldn’t get to it really got to me. Had I (or Husband) set aside that morning time to help the kids start distance learning, it would have gone so much more smoothly. Of course.
Realizing that someone has to be available to help the children as they do their work (just to find things on Canvas or help them with directions), Husband and I made a new plan: He’ll take Monday and Wednesday mornings and I’ll take the other three days.
Of course things never go according to plan. It’s like the universe didn’t get the memo about today’s Zoom meeting marathon for both parents. But instead of trying to juggle the kids and my own work, I moved “school” to the afternoon, after all the meetings were done. This allowed the kids to do what they can do on their own in the morning and enjoy free time. So, yeah, we did pivot.
In the Friends episode, “The One with the Cop,” Ross keeps yelling “Pivot!” to his friends in order to move the massive sofa up the angled staircase in his apartment building. Spoiler alert! It does not work. Sometimes no kind of pivoting can solve a problem. No matter how you twist and turn the problem, sometimes there’s no way to get around it. But other times it does work. Not often, but sometimes.